Love Waits / Love is Now

being sad
ocasonally
is okay

it means you still have feelings
that you are still human

giving all the way in
means
depression
has left you reeling

but it doesn't mean
it doesn't mean
you're through

they want you
to give up
pack it up
don't come back
from their attack

but no
your ability
is endless
you may not know it
but you've got traction

love is offshore
in the conflict
waiting for the time
to be right
to fight
for a lovewar

maybe you thought
you couldn't wait
that long
too many years
too many nights
filled with loneliness
and confirmed fears.

but no,
the serenity
will come when it is ready
hold steady
when the boots come to tread
deadly on the backs
of heroes

zero in on the indecision
play backwards
the fates'
indecent indiscretions
love waits for now
or for never
hold tight
love is always
and for now
when the mind's eye
becomes a hallway

hate is a doorway
you can fall through
for freedom
hopelessness
may have vast grasps
but no
see dreams come
your soul is the sun
love waits for never
or for now but
is never done.

-for Tasha

Floodgates (vingettes about water and death and my father)

etchings on the bedroom
window
beckon...

Lost voices in the moistened
air
my 8 year old fingers
traced their lips
hopeful smile
to eradicate
the evil
spirits
they slept
in my closet.

The moon behind the eyes
they were open.
someone to witness
me eaten whole.
my childhood soul
stolen
like eggs from a basket
like pie from a sill.

The moon would protect me
fell in love on an astral plane
wherein his face
always looking the same
vague; dreamy
like that old film
with the spaceship
lodged in his eye.
how I longed to be there
on air

my small hands
trembling, drawing
fine lines, learning
to work the moisture
into lines,
landscapes, waterfalls
dream villages in space
where I could soar away
from my father's voice
calling from the closet
"come soon, son."
and those red eyes
in the sooty inky void
my clothes, rock and roll
t-shirts and 501s
my dreams
but beyond the seams
black hands
always waiting
always wanting
always taunting me
from the
black space
unrecognizable face
will I see you when I sleep?
will you know the man I fought so hard to be?

Paige turned
old photos
burned
in the twilight
ash and sadness
of the past
evaporating
like liquid
glass.